It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
