last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Randomize
