ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
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