I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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