Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize
