If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
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