Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
