Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
