dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
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