I wannas sexs uuuuu
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Randomize
