Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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