No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
