All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
