that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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