So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Randomize
