I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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