I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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