The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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