I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
barbara walters just said penis...
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
When are your genitals available?
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Randomize
