I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Bring me that man meat
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
