Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
