is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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