Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
