Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
