I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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