why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
