And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
