Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
I have already put on my inside pants.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
