O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
