Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Randomize
