you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize
