I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
