remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
