he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Use "feeling words"
Yay
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
