just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
