oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
