Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Randomize
