Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
