I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Randomize
