Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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