absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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