well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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