I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
