Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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