My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Randomize
