let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
