i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
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