I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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