I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
