Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Randomize
