Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
